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After flashing into my room, I change into a pair of pajamas, then mess up my bed. I have not slept all night. So why don’t I feel tired? Maybe Q require no sleep I muse, thinking about what more I could accomplish with the extra time. I walk up to the chronometer shocked by the readout. Although it seems like I’ve been gone no more than a couple of days, thirteen months have passed since I was last aboard the Enterprise! And it is not morning; it is late in the evening. So much for extra time.
Sam and Al are stirring in their cage and I feed them. Peering down at them, I sense they are in good health and spirits. Mother has probably been caring for them in my absence.
What else has happened while I was away?
Realizing I shouldn’t walk up to my parents after more than a year away, I slip into an existence between their universe and another one. My parents may have given up on my return long ago. They had to carry on with their lives at some point.
I enter the living area without revealing myself and listen to their after-dinner conversation. They are sitting on the sofa talking about a confrontation they had with some species known as the Keznik. I have never heard of this race, but from my parents’ conversation, I gather that they aren’t much for diplomacy. I listen for an hour, during which I’m never mentioned. I don’t probe either of their thoughts, afraid I’m not their either.
Slipping out of my parents’ quarters, I move on to the bridge where I learn more about the Kesnik. They are a militant race bent on concurring the galaxy. The Enterprise first encountered them not long after my departure when they inadvertently showed the aliens how to use the pocket wormholes.
Listening to Riker and Data, I learn that this situation reminds the captain of the events that led up to the Klingons achieving warp capability. Surely they are not that formidable of an enemy. I will have to learn more about them.
Riker exits the bridge, leaving Data in charge. I remain close to Data, longing to speak to my mentor. If Data were alone in his quarters, I would materialize before him. He could best handle my return and would know how to ease the news of my arrival to others.
When his shift ends a few hours later, I follow Data off the bridge and to his quarters. I Q-Flash several meters behind him, eager to finally speak to someone. Startled, he turns to face me. It is good that he does not have a heart or I would surely have sent him to sickbay.
“Shannara! I cannot believe my eyes!” he says, using one of the many cliches he’s picked up from living with humans over the years. “We had thought that Q would never permit you to return to this universe.” Quickly closing the gap between us, he places his arms around me.
I welcome his embrace, so relieved to make contact with someone other than a Q. “To me, it seems as though I’ve only been gone a couple of days. Time does not pass inside the Continuum as it does here,” I explain. “I wasn’t aware of how much I’d aged until right before I returned. Now, I don’t know how to approach anyone. How do I explain why I’ve been gone so long? My parents believe that I deserted them and have already moved on with their lives.”
“Let me talk with them,” Data offers. “I will tell them that you have returned. It will not be as difficult as you fear. They will be more than eager to welcome you back into their lives...as I am.” Clutching my wrist, he stares at me as though not yet believing I’m really here. “Stay in my quarters until I return for you.”
“All right.”
After he leaves, I sit down at his console and tap into the database. I have more than a year’s worth of events to catch up on. I learn that all Starfleet vessels were granted passage through the pocket wormholes only days after I left for the Continuum and that much of the Delta Quadrant has since been mapped. I read through countless logs by a dozen or more Starfleet captains, enthralled by the details of many new cultures.
My research is interrupted when Data returns with my parents.
“Oh my God! It’s really true!” Mother exclaims as she rushes over to me. Of course, she would never believe that Data would lie to her, but so much time has she waited that she long ago dulled any hopes of my return.
“I’m so sorry,” I say. “I didn’t mean to–“ I cannot finish as tears overcome me.
“We’re so happy to see you,” Mother replies, wrapping her arms around me. “Aren’t we, Worf?”
I peer up at Father, sensing a strange ambivalence coming from him. He doesn’t know whether he can trust me. He fears that my allegiance to the Continuum will persuade me to betray him again. I will have to work hard to regain his confidence in me.
“Worf,” Mother continues, “please, welcome our daughter home.”
Father momentarily grits his teeth before stepping forward. “Have you returned for good?” he asks.
“I cannot make any promises where Q is concerned,” I say, biting my lip. Q is certainly not done with me, probably never will be. “Do any of us have control during one of his games?”
Father nods, knowingly. “If he has truly given you the full power of the Q, then perhaps you will one day beat him at his game. Tell me that you will never join him willingly and we will take you back into our home. We will once again be a family of four.”
My cheeks grow warm as I think about my little brother. How has Eric's brief stay inside the Continuum affected him? Was he trapped in a black universe or one as equally terrifying? I can’t imagine the nightmares he’s had during my absence. Although Eric suffered due to Q’s actions, I'm still overwhelmed by guilt as though I somehow could have prevented his trip to the Continuum. Maybe I unwittingly encouraged Q to take my brother. He believed that by snatching Eric he could get me to admit that I wanted to join the Continuum. Now I feel a strong need to compensate for whatever anguish has befallen my brother.
Unlike Eric, I enjoyed my time inside the Continuum. I was able to unlock the mystery of the black universe and solve every riddle the Q brought before me. If Mother or Father find out I went willingly, they will be devastated and our family might be forever shattered.
Yet despite this fear, I can’t denounce the Continuum. I am more afraid of what the Q will do if I violate my probation. A thousand years! How will I ever survive that long?
Suddenly aware of the awkward silence that has come between us, I speak up. “We should do something really nice for Eric,” I say. “I’ve missed him and I feel bad about what Q put him through. How is he handling it?”
“He is doing okay,” Mother responds, then with a smile, “misses his big sister. I think he will be equally eager to do something for you.”
“Let’s go home then.” I take a hand from each of my parents ready to step out into the corridor, but before we reach the doorway, I glance back at my android mentor. “Thank you, Data.”
“It was my pleasure,” he responds. “Do not be a stranger. Remember, I will always be here to offer you advise and guidance.”
“I will.”
* * * * * * * *
“Eric, someone is here to see you,” Mother says, stepping into my brother’s room ahead of me.
“Shannara!” he exclaims, jumping up from the floor where he has a pile of toys scattered about. He rushes toward me and wraps his arms around me. “I thought I lost you!” He tightens his grip. “The bad place took you and it was all my fault. I didn’t know what that man wanted from me.”
I gently pull away from my brother so I can look him in the eyes. He has grown quite a bit since I last saw him and I know that I’ve missed so much of his personal growth as well. I hope that he hasn’t been too preoccupied by my absence. Eric, it wasn’t your fault. None of it was. The Q are very manipulative and Q used you to get at me. I want you to tell yourself that you’re not to blame and that you shouldn’t feel guilty. I’m the one who should apologize to you. I’m sorry for staying away so long and for making you worry about me.”
“Oh Shannara, I’m so happy you’re back! Please, say you’ll never go away again!”
Biting at my lower lip, I refrain from making a promise I probably cannot keep. Undoubtedly, I will go away again. What if more time passes when I next travel over to the Continuum? What if my brother is a grown man after my next trip? I missed a year of his schooling already. I could have been around to help him learn how to read or to memorize his multiplication tables.
“Eric, I can’t–“
“Shannara,” Mother interrupts. “Surely you have control over this Q-flashing. If your loyalties lie in the right place, you’ll stay where you belong.”
“Oh...you’re right.” I don’t want to tell her I’ll never leave, for I know that one day I will betray that promise. I can’t tell her that my loyalties don’t entirely lie with her and Father; that I’ve felt an affinity for Q for a long time. “I love all of you and although it only seemed like a couple of days to me, I really missed you.” My words feel so awkward, but I am determined to plunge forward and reestablish my place within this family. “Let’s celebrate my return. Why don’t we plan a lovely dinner and you invite your friends. Eric can even invite Brett if he wants.”
“Shannara, I wish that were possible, but your father and I must attend a diplomatic conference this evening. We want very much to spend time with you, but we have our duties. This conference is vital in establishing Starfleet strategy in dealing with a new enemy known as the Keznik.”
“The aliens who used the wormhole technology,” I say before realizing that I’m admitting to having spied on the crew before materializing on board.
“Yes. How much do you know about them?”
“Everything in the computer’s database. I read it while Data went to tell you and Father that I’d returned. Mother, may I attend this conference?”
“No! That wouldn’t be appropriate. Why would you even ask such a thing?”
Before I answer, I think about how I’d once been allowed to participate in the mapping of the Delta Quadrant. Now after spending time in an alternate universe among a species of superior beings, I’m not allowed to attend a simple conference. The irony does not escape me. “I thought it would be an opportunity to learn more about diplomacy.” I pause. “You know, it could help if I ever decide to pursue a career in Starfleet.” I have no intention of ever joining the Academy, but hope Mother cannot sense this.
