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As I step off the alien transporter pad, Medic Parkin steps forward and holds her arms out to me. " Greetings, Shannara. Please do not be afraid of me," she says and graciously takes my heavy away bag from me.
"I am not," I reply, realizing my tone is a bit strong.
"Good." Her smile is warm, genuine. "Do you feel the emotions of everyone on this ship?"
I concentrate on this task, finding it surprisingly easy to sort out many differing emotions. I have never been able to do this well with the Enterprise crew! "I sense so many minds. It's...." I clutch at my stomach, suddenly feeling a bit nauseous. Parkin offers a hand for support, and after a couple of deep breaths, I manage to regain my composure. "Most of them are eager to welcome me aboard. So why do I feel so uncomfortable?"
"I am not surprised. You have just been bombarded by more than a thousand minds, all coming from a culture foreign to you. It will become easier over time."
Closing my eyes, I try to focus on a single individual....a child, perhaps close to my age. She is homesick and unaccustomed to life on a starship. I envy her time in a real home on a real planet. Maybe the Akodians aren't so different from me.
"We have several tests to perform," the Medic informs me, "but first you need to get settled into a room. We have expected your arrival and specially designed your room to accomodate a child. I will be overseeing your evaluation in the privacy of this room."
"That's not how you tested Captain Picard and Dr. Crusher. You took them through a pocket wormhole." I sound disappointed and worry whether she will dismiss the evaluation due to my over zealousness.
"That is correct." Parkin does not seem surprised, nor perturbed by my statement. "Your situation, however, is different from their's. You were not regenerated as they were. If you successfully complete your evaluation, you will be introduced to members of the crew at that time."
"But why do I have to wait?"
"I am not worried about how you will interact with one another, but rather how they might influence your decisions."
I nod, though I don't like the idea of being confined to a single room for private testing. How much time will I spend alone? Although I have been permitted to walk to and from Data's quarters for my tutoring sessions for quite some time, frightened of being left by myself in a room on an alien starship.
As Parkin leads me out of the transporter room and down the corridor, I fall a step behind, not wanting to hold her hand. No matter how friendly she is toward me, she is not my mother. A pang of homesickness hits me. Could I really be missing the Enterprise? No, I miss my parents and Data, maybe even my little brother, but a starship is just a starship, something to get you from place to place.
We pass no one during our journey, and I suspect that everyone is under instructions not to cross my path. But why? Surely a mere passing in the corridor would not greatly influence me. Despite what Parkin told me, I wonder whether I am dangerous to them, or them to me. Maybe I am already being tested. Parkin is checking whether I will give in to paranoia or remain calm. Placing my hands behind my back, I decide on the latter. A brief glance back from the Medic receives a smile from me.
I believe I have passed the first test.
My temporary room is much larger than my bedroom on the Enterprise. It has a king-size bed like the one my parents use, a sofa and chairs, a small dining table, and in one corner, a play area has been set up for me with what looks like several games. They obviously want to entertain me, but I suspect a hidden test in each of them.
"You may have an hour to settle in before we begin," Parkin says. I don't voice my suspicions that the testing has already begun. She sets my away bag on the edge of the bed and then turns toward me. "Do not be frightened by the emotions on this ship--or the wormhole. We will consider your best interests first."
"I'm not frightened," I reply, unable to take the nervous edge out of my voice. I believe the Akodians do not wish to harm me and yet, I am uncomfortable with my inability to completely tune out their emotions. The best I can do is focus on a single mind, so I select the girl I'd chosen earlier in the transporter room. Dauri, I realize is her name. she is trying to communicate with me telepathically. I wish I could understand her.
"I know you are frustrated with your dormant abilities. One day soon, if you're strong and disciplined, I believe you will have a great mind. Open it to the opportunities of the universe and listen to its call."
Unsure how to respond, I simply listen. Yeah, a great mind, and I'm lost for words.
"If you care to have anything to eat or drink during your wait, there's a replicating unit over there." She points to the wall on the other side of the table. The unit is similar to the replicator in our quarters. "I will leave you alone now, however should you require any assistance, there is a comm switch beside the computer monitor."
"Thank you for the lovely room," I say. "It's more than I expected."
"You are our guest. We believe in treating our guests as well as our own."
Once Parkin departs and I have again placed my belongings inside drawers that are not my own, I explore my new room, beginning with the gaming area. By far the most fascinating game is one that uses marbles. Several trays are attached by a spiral cylinder, and as far as I can tell, players are supposed to place their marble inside the top tray and watch the marble spiral down until it is trapped by one of the many holes along the way. Grabbing a handful of marbles from the bottom tray, I decide to experiment with the game. I drop one marble inside the top tray and tilt my head to watch it glide downward. It falls into a hole about halfway down. Suddenly, the game lights up and a load siren-like noise blares. Startled, I drop the rest of the marbles and step back. What if I've done something I should not have? My first day on an alien ship, and I spend it getting into trouble!
I look around the room, wondering what I should do. Run? Hide? Like either of those options would do me any good! I walk up to the computer console and push the button to what I hope is the comm system. All the while, the game continues to ring in my ears.
"Medic Parkin!" I exclaim, "are you there?" I can barely hear my voice over the cacophony.
"Calm down, dear child," the medic says over the unit.
And in that moment, the game falls silent. I turn back toward it, my stare filled with stern determination to get even with its timing. "I was just having a little trouble with one of the games. Everything's all right now."
"Are you sure? I want you to feel comfortable in your new surroundings."
"Y-yes. I'll be fine. Maybe I'll just rest for a while and wait for you to show me how to play the games before I try any more of them."
"If you wish, but I assure you that every toy provided for you is perfectly safe. Sometimes, the best way to learn is through trial and error."
Is Parkin coaxing me to attempt the game again as an unannounced test? Clenching and unclenching my fists, I try to work up the courage to meet the challenge. "Well--maybe I'll try it one more time." Severing the link, I turn to face the game.
I take one step forward. Stop.
Why am I still so reluctant? I want to prove how brave and strong I am. If I don't pass this test, not only will I fail, but so will the Federation/Akodian alliance.
I'm not going to fail! Hastily, I pick up the spilt marbles and return to the game. The played marble is now in the bottom tray. staring at me,like an eyeball, mocking me. So play already, it is demanding of me. I raise one marble to the top, pausing to wonder if I should use the same tactic as before. It's not as if I've learned anything new about the game. Maybe I'll get lucky, and stumble on what works by accident. Trial and error. That's what Parkin told me.
I drop the marble and watch as it spirals downward. It falls in a hole further down than the first, and I brace myself for the loud ringing.
Nothing.
Either I have done something right.....or very wrong. I guess, I just don't understand this game. In frustration, I release the rest of the marbles. One falls almost immediately, followed by another, sending the machine into screams of complaint. Oh, that fixes the problem, Shannara, I scold myself.
"Bravo! Bravo!" Q says, finally making his appearance. "Now you've made all the little worlds disappear." I turn around to find him lying on my bed in pajamas. The drooping hat atop his head would seem hilarious if I wasn't so annoyed by the continuing protests of the marble game.
"Make it stop! Make it stop!" I plea with him, covering my ears. "I won't listen to you until you do."
With a wave of his hand, Q simultaneously silences the game and disappears off the bed only to reappear beside me. "You could have done that just as easily. I wish you would learn to accept the gift I've given you."
"Why are you here? I mean, now. Why didn't you come earlier during my six-day trip? I might have welcomed your support and encouragement then."
"And now?"
"Now you're just a nuisance. You're interfering with my relations with the Akodians...probably because you're jealous."
"Moi, jealous? Don't be so obtuse. We can transcend above mere mortal emotions."
"I don't believe you. Otherwise, you wouldn't take such pleasure in popping in unexpectedly. Besides we are far superior to the Akodians. No matter how powerful or how intelligent your people are, I bet you can't escape basic emotions any more than the rest of the universe." I fold my arms across my chest, letting him know that he is not going to convince me of otherwise.
"Believe what you wish." He bends down to talk softly into my ear--an odd behavior, since we are alone. At least, I believe we are alone. Other members of the Q are listening....I assure you they will *not* become jealous of the Akodians."
The Q are spying on me! I'm only a pawn in one of q's games, aren't I? Or had he meant to warn me about the other members of the Continuum? Why would they care if a little mortal girl helped form an alliance between two mortal races? "I thought omnipotent beings were beyond caring for lower lifeforms. "
""I'm insulted! You've placed every Q in the same class. And I thought you harbored no prejudice beliefs."
"I never thought of it like that," I offer meekly. "So are there other Q like you?"
"Oh yes and as many different breeds as you can imagine."
I suddenly pick up on an emotion Q has been trying to shield. "They aren't jealous of the Akodians. They are jealous of me! Many of them feel you've devoted too much attention to me and now you're afraid they might contaminate the world you so neatly created for me."
"Precisely. No telepath has ever agreed to join our ranks."
"I haven't yet."
"No, but soon others will come to tempt you." Before I can demand elaboration, Q flashes out and Parkin steps inside. Suddenly, I remember that I never did solve the mystery of the marble game. Guess that makes for one failed test.
"Greetings! I realize it has not quite been an hour," the medic tells me, "but I can sense your readiness."
My readiness? "I'm not so sure," I tell her. If she senses it so well, then why don't I feel ready? Right now I'd rather call the whole deal off and go running to my parents. Why did I ever let Q talk me into this?
Q did not talk me into this, I tell myself. I made up my own mind and must follow through on my promises to Father, to Captain Picard, and to the Federation. They are counting on me. Most importantly, I must finish this mission successfully for myself.
Glancing back at the game area, I wonder if Parkin is aware a superior being visited me aboard her ship. She has not mentioned him. Why? And if she doesn't, should I?
"It's okay to admit fears and uncertainties." She steps toward the games, eyeing the marble trays closely. I hold my breath as I await her verbal observation. "So you tossed all your little worlds at once. Interesting."
Little worlds? Q had called the marbles that, too. Had he been trying to give me a clue about the significance of the game? I approach Parkin and once I am standing beside her, ask, "Do the holes represent pocket wormholes?"
She smiles at me. "The game chooses your destination, which region of space to explore today."
"Today?" I cannot believe what I am hearing! Probably, I am letting my hopes get too high, and she really means players in general. Still, I have to ask. "Am I going to travel through a wormhole?"
"If you pass all the preliminary tests."
All. An overwhelming objective. How many tests before I prove myself worthy of this great honor? "I accept your challenge."
"I knew you would choose well. Let us have a seat on the floor where we can face each other." She points at a small rug in the middle of the gaming area. This reminds me of a time two years ago when Mrs. Dewberry shared a classic tale with my fellow classmates and I. Do Akodians have fairy tales in their history.
"Will you tell me a story?" I ask. Hopefully, she will not think I'm trying to avoid her tests. "I want to learn about your culture and one of the best ways to learn about a people is through their literature."
Parkin nods, with pleasure. It dawns on me that she really has no specific tests and that she is actually letting me choose my own. I will play along for a while, testing this theory.
"My people have many stories, some happy, some sad, but most were written with a lesson in mind." She pauses, I suspect to reflect on her childhood. Her eyes grow slightly glassy, and she raises a hand to her chin. "There was one in particular which I begged my Father read to me over and over when I was a small child."
I imagine she remembers every word as I do the stories of Kahless. She is as eager to share as I am to listen. "Go on."
"This is a sad story about a young girl who loses her family in a house fire. Somehow, she alone manages to escape by climbing out her second-story window and down a large Gusomberry tree. She wanders aimlessly around the wooded area near where she lived. Since her house had been completely destroyed, her neighbors believe she, too, died along with her family."
I am touched by this story, but so far cannot see where there is a lesson to be learned from it.
"Now this was during a time when regeneration was in its infancy. My people had not yet established the emotional impact regeneration has on victims, nor did they know exactly how it would work in each new case.
"Anyway, the arbiter presiding decides to grant the regeneration of the burned family. Since they had three small children, the time for regeneration is set and a crowd forms to watch. Meanwhile, the young girl is peeking from behind the crowd, too afraid to come forward. She longs to be reunited with her family, but remembers the regeneration horror stories she has heard at school."
I raise a hand to stifle a gasp. Although I want desperately to pass the medic's evaluation, I'm not sure I want to know any more about this regeneration.
"Do you want me to stop?" Parkin's voice is filled with concern, yet I sense she would be very disappointed if I chose not to listen to the remainder of her story.
"No," I reply, trying to convince myself as much as her.
She fixes me dubiously, but when I return her stare with equal conviction, her expression softens. Nodding, she says, "All right, I'll finish the story. Often times, stories can be exaggerated as they are passed from person to person, the next always adding a little to the tale they've heard."
"But that's lying!"
"Indeed it is. Unfortunately, the girl believes every evil word she has heard about regeneration, and it is that firm belief that prevents her from stepping forward and shouting above the tumult of the crowd to confess her escape from the fire."
"Confess? You make it sound as though she's guilty. She couldn't save her family. Why does living make her guilty?" Biting at my lower lip, I fear that the Akodian morals are different from the ones I've been taught didn't. If so, how do we get around this obstacle and form our alliance? Although I'd known this would be difficult, I still feel unprepared. As a child of two Starfleet officers, I have encountered many different races and have been exposed to many Federation cultures. But somehow, this interaction is not quite the same. The Akodians are not Federation members, and thus, they don't necessarily share the collective beliefs of the United Federation of Planets.
"Perhaps 'confess' sounds a little harsh to you," Parkin admits. "Nonetheless, it is the correct word. And because she does not step forward and her people continue to believe her dead, the regeneration procedure is performed on the entire family, including the surviving daughter."
"I don't understand. How can they--?"
"They could not, of course. When her family is regenerated, it has the opposite effect on the girl. She crumples to the ground and the onlookers around her part to let a doctor through to aid her. There is no hope, however, for she died the moment her family was regenerated."
"Couldn't they just regenerate her?"
"No. Regeneration can only be performed once. She was alive when regeneration was performed on her and ironically it brought her death when it returned her family."
I muse over this tale, contemplating its meaning. The girl was wrong to keep the truth from her people. The story does not imply a moral belief that the girl should not have escaped death as I had at first believed. Rather, it is meant as a lesson for courage. Had the girl only found enough strength to step forward, she would not have met her own demise.
"I'm not afraid to step forward," I tell her. While I am still bothered by the concept of regeneration, I do not want my fear to become my undoing. "Please, tell me what I have to do or say to make you believe I am ready."
Without a word, Parkin raises her arm and touches my forehead. Her slender fingers run gently across my ridges. Unsure why she is doing this, I play along, lifting my arm to brush her creases with my fingers. First the tips of my fingers and then my whole hand begins to tingle as though an electrical current is passing between us. Suddenly, I hear a single word, a whisper I would say if Parkin's mouth were moving: "Trust."
"I--I," I begin before realizing she does not want me to answer with my voice. *I do trust you,* I think. Studying the medics eyes, I cannot tell whether or not I have successfully projected my thought toward her. *I trust you.*
She smiles and lowers her arm. "You must trust more than me, more than my people or our technologies. You must trust yourself."
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Many people find it difficult to trust their instincts, their fears and intuition. Often times, they rely too heavily on logic and techno-gadgets. I'm asking you to trust in what your gut tells you. Do not be tempted by the laws of reason."
"Always?" I question. "Isn't logic correct most of the time?"
Parkin stands up and walks over to my viewwindow. She does not respond to my question, leaving me instead to ponder its answer. I am uncomfortable by the continuing silence, but suspect that my endurance of it is for some reason the most important test. So I remain on the floor, legs folded and chewing on my lower lip, as I consider how I must go about this task of trusting myself. Although there is no easy answer, I vow to spend the rest of my life seeking it.
Once I reach this conclusion, Parkin turns back toward me, I suspect knowing my mind, and informs me. "We will take a shuttlecraft, you and I, and travel to the other side of the wormhole."
I clamber to my feet. "Now?"
"No. For now, we will break for lunch and a bit of rest."
Pleased that I have managed to pass Parkin's testing, the first round anyway, I am eager to share this news. I'm also a bit homesick. "May I contact my parents?"
"Yes, you may." She raises a hand to stall me from rushing over to the console. "You must not speak of anything that has happened since you beamed aboard this ship." She raises an eyebrow. "Understood?"
Not really, I think. However, I know that she doesn't mean for me to understand why, only that she will tolerate no violation of this demand. Quite possibly, this is the most difficult test I am to face. "Okay," I respond in a raspy voice.
Parkin lowers her hand, and hesitantly, I make my way over to the console. I study the command buttons, trying to decipher them. Finally after several seconds, I hit on a pattern that I believe will link me to the Huron. Commander Data's image appears on the small monitor. I smile in triumph.
"I am happy to see you, Shannara," he says, "but you must wish to speak with your parents."
"Yes, I want to let them know I'm all right," I reply. As Data links me to my parents' private quarters, I glance back nervously at Parkin. Although I haven't disobeyed her, her constant stare is unnerving. Several seconds pass. Why haven't my parents answered the incoming call? Parkin sighs impatiently and wraps her arms across her chest. "Sorry."
When my parents finally appear on the screen, I find it odd that Father is wearing his hair down instead of braided as usual. And Mother is trying to catch her breath. "Shannara," she manages.
"Is everything all right?" I ask.
Mother giggles, her curls rolling down her face as she hides.....embarrassment? I lower my eyes and wonder if they were not quite as worried about me as I had thought. Yet underneath their giggles, I sense relief. "Of course, everything's fine, sweetheart," Mother replies. "How are they treating you?"
Another glance at Parkin as I decide how best to handle this question. "Fine. Parkin has been really nice to me."
"Are you sure you're fine? I can sense how nervous you are."
"Yes!" Rolling my eyes, I wish sometimes I could turn my emotions off as Data can--or at least block them from Mother.
"Have they said how long they intend to keep you?" Father asks. He appears ready to fight for my return if necessary. I believe he is more worried than he is willing to showing.
"I'm not sure they even know yet. They are going--" I stop suddenly. Do I want to jeopardize my mission? I could go home right now, I warn myself. That would end this mission in failure, plus weaken my chances of any further adventures. "They will make that decision when they feel I've progressed satisfactorily," I modify my answer.
He nods, surprisingly accepting of my explanation, despite the awkward pause.
"I love and miss you both, but I have to go. I'll be back home soon...promise." Not offering them a chance for further inquiries, I terminate the commlink. Turning to the medic, I ask, "Was that satisfactory?"
"Yes," she responds. "You may replicate yourself a meal and then take a nap. Our replicators are now programmed with many foods from your Federation cultures. We will rendevous in two hours. Many crew members will be in the shuttlebay to see us off. They are very eager to meet you."
I nearly ask why, but bite at my tongue. I don't want to jeopardize my earned trip this late in the game. "I will be ready," I promise. Once she steps out of the room, I walk up to the replicator and order a Mantickian Pate', one of Grandma Lwaxana's favorite dishes, and a raktajino. To my delight, both recipes are programmed into the Akodian ship's computer. Carrying the hot food over to the small table, I sit down to eat.
*****
Medik Parkin was not exaggerating when she said "many crew members." The alien shuttlebay is nearly full to capacity when we enter. The volume in the room is overwhelming, but I sense they are all thinking well of me. Waving at them, I try to project my gratitude. This sends them into an uproar of applause. Medik Parkin takes me by the arm and leads me inside the nearest shuttlecraft. I am almost disappointed to leave the ululation behind.
